whitehairedprettyboy

[The duo look at each other in unison, then to Valmont with an unimpressed expression.]

Are you saying my Pokemon are dirty?

[Because he certainly doesn't think so, and he proves this point by eating the cracker she just carried over to him in her mouth.]

I - no! Of course not! [ He backtracks hastily, repressing a shudder at the idea of sharing food with an animal. Mental note: wait for Raikov to brush his teeth before kissing him again. ] I was merely asking!

[ He becomes very interested in watching his tea steep. ]

[Oh please, Valmont. It's not like she has diseases.]

You generally don't "just ask." There's always a reason with you.

[He prepares a cup for himself and says something to the Joltik in Russian. She chirps in approval and skitters on to Raikov's shoulder. You're now getting the stink eye from a tiny yellow fuzzball, V.]

[ Well, how is he supposed to know what diseases she doesn't have? You've got to assume the worst with these things. ]

I just thought - well, animals on the table, it doesn't seem proper, you know? [ He gestures vaguely towards his Stunky, who has finished her cracker and is once again making sweet love to his leg, but who at least has remained on the floor. ] But I certainly didn't mean to imply that she or you were particularly unsanitary - could you tell her not to look at me like that? [ Please don't electrocute him, Katya. He hasn't even drunk his tea yet. ]

[Raikov joins in on the stink eye at that statement.]

My dear Niles... You really should learn to watch what you say.

[Katya makes a sound that can easily be identified as "yeah, ya jerk!"]

[ Using his first name. That's cheating. Reluctantly, he opens his mouth. ]

I...

[ You can do it, Valmont. That thing. The one you've been practicing when no one was listening. You got this. ]

I... apologize. [ His mouth twists as the words come out, but at least they're clear, and apparently sincerely meant. Now, was that so hard? (Yes. It was.) ]

[About damn time he apologized for something. Raikov's expression softens and he nonchalantly goes to pour some milk into his tea. Katya remains crabby though.]

You're forgiven. I assume you won't be eating any biscuits?

Edited 2014-11-23 02:44 (UTC)

[ He's trying. He really is. ]

Not if the two of you eat them all, anyway.

[ He carefully levers out the tea bag, then measures out the precise right amount of milk and sugar, determined from years of experience. Inhaling deeply, he lifts the teacup to his lips and -

Okay. This isn't working. ]

Can you get her to stop glaring at me, please? [ All those eyes. It's rather unnerving. And he does not like to be unnerved whilst drinking tea. It rather defeats the purpose. ]

[He rolls his eyes]

Go and play with Stunky.

[ONE LAST GLARE before she disappears down his back and on to the floor to complain to Val's pokemon.]

That better?

[ In reply, he takes a sip of his tea.

Aaahhh. That is absolutely heavenly. He is never going to abandon tea again. If it were a choice between giving up tea and giving up sex with Raikov... Well, Ivan old chap, it's been fun. ]

Much.

[ Meanwhile, Stunky curls her tail consolingly around Katya. Her trainer's a good person! Really! Otherwise he wouldn't be her trainer! But she's sorry he was mean to her! Being mean is a thing he does sometimes! ]

[He shouldn't be mean though! Papa isn't mean to us.

Raikov, meanwhile, tries to study Valmont's expression.]

I'm glad you're enjoying your tea.

[He stirs his a bit before taking a sip as well. Ahh. Perfect... Just like everything he does.]

[ I know! I try to get him to be nice but I don't think he listens to me! He doesn't like it when I'm nice to him either! But other than being mean he really is a good person! ]

"Enjoying" may not be a strong enough word.

[ His expression is about as blissed-out as he lets it get outside the bedroom. It might be time for you to start getting jealous of tea, Raikov. ]

[If you say so... She's still skeptical. Then again, anyone who is mean to Raikov is generally on her bad side.

And he's quite the opposite of jealous right now. Raikov grins, thoroughly amused by Valmont's positive response.]

You're welcome, by the way.

[ Katya's right to be skeptical. Stunky's a good kid, but you can trust anything she says about her trainer to be about 200 times more positive than the truth. She wants to believe in him. She wants to believe so hard.

That being said, Valmont actually is trying to be nice to Raikov these days. Whether he's succeeding or not is a little more up for debate. ]

What? Oh, yes. Thank you, and all that. [ Sorry. He's a little distracted. ] However did you come by a proper appreciation of tea?

[Aren't all pokemon that way about their trainers?

And Raikov appreciates it. V has his moments but he is getting a little better. ... Just a little though.]

Would you believe you English aren't the only ones who love tea?

[ All of V's are, anyway. Though given the way he treats them, they really shouldn't be. Poor things.

Look, he did a real apology. With words and everything. He doesn't know what else you want from him. ]

You'll forgive my assumption, then. America has soured me on the idea that any other country might know how to produce a decent cup of tea. [ The horrors he's seen. Iced tea, really. ] But it seems the Russians have an idea of what they're doing, if you're any indication, Ivan. [ He takes another sip. God, that's good. ]

Of course.

[Smug smug smug. Then his expression temporarily changes to one of disgust.]

But I still don't understand why you went to America.

[Why would anyone want to go there willingly?]

I've told you, it was for my work. Believe me, given the choice I would have preferred to stay in England, but that just wasn't feasible.

[ After all, it's hard enough to transport a giant sentient dragon statue within the country. ]

[Raikov rubs his chin in thought.]

You know, you never did tell me what you do for a living aside from collecting artifacts.

Acquisitions.

[ He sips his tea casually. ]

I don't seem to recall you telling me what you did, either.

That's rather vague, isn't it?

And you never asked.

[Or looked in his closet.]

You're certainly welcome to inquire about specifics. And I'm asking now. What is it you do, exactly?

[ If his closet doesn't contain any green suits, Valmont isn't interested. ]

[It's Olive Drab.

... He supposes he can't tell Valmont. It's not like he can sabotage him. Not when he owes Raikov so much for being his sugar daddy the past month.]

I was in the military.

[ Olive and green are completely different colors. Get it straight. ]

Ah. A military man. [ Well, that's interesting. ] What was your rank?

[It's close enough.]

Major.

[This is the most he's told anyone here. Congrats, V.]

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